My best friend recently lost her 19 year old brother in a car crash. What do I say to her?
kat asked:
She has been texting me about how much she misses him and I don’t know what to say, I just start crying because I love her and I don’t want to see her like this 
I just keep telling her that he’s in a better place (she’s Catholic) and that I’m praying for her but she said she doesn’t know if she will ever forgive God. Could anyone please give me information on how to help her? The day of the accident she called me and she was sobbing and she wanted to tell him not to go in the car and she wanted it to be her instead. I’ve been over her house alot and she seems fine but then she says she pictures the car crash and she starts randomly crying and it just makes me so sad to see her like that because she’s known as the funniest, craziest, happiest girl at my gymnastics club. Everyone loves her and I would love it if you guys could tell me how I could help her through this grief process.
We’re both 15 by the way.
Thank you for all these great answers guys.
http://blog.cleveland.com/metro/2008/05/19yearold_brecksville_man_kill.html
This is him. RIP Dan, you will be missed. I love you Claire
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Filed Under Friends |
Tagged With Car Crash, Grief Process, Metro
Comments
10 Responses to “My best friend recently lost her 19 year old brother in a car crash. What do I say to her?”
just be supportive, listen and empathize. scriptures tell us grieving is a natural process. pray for her strength.
“im sorry for your loss”?
Just keep being there for her. She is going to need alot of time to heal. Probably forever. But don’t quit on her. She needs your friendship. I had a friend that lost her sister in a car crash, and never got over it. It is definitely life changing.
religiously, you say say that things happen for a reason. as a friend, you could tell her that she is very much loved. but overall, there isn’t much that you can say really.. all you can do is help her cope, maybe talk about the GOOD memories that she had with her brother, and let her cry as much as she needs to. if you have nothing to say, it’s okay. just make sure you’re there for her.
She’s lucky to have a friend like you who cares so much for her.
It’s hard to know what to say, but be honest - a simple “I’m so sorry, and I know nothing I say will make you feel any better, but I’m here for you any time, to cry with you, or be your shoulder to cry on”. Just listen to her. Try to keep her spirits up by doing things and keeping her busy. It will take a long time for her to feel good again, even then she will still have her down moments. As long as she always knows she has support - that’s about the only thing you can do.
you need to comfort her by saying, pretty much what you are saying, and tell her she needs to forgive god because it was her brothers time and everyone has a time.
you need to tell her that it was not her and YOUR happy that you are still with her.
comfort as much as you can…just hug her.
my neighbor’s dad died last year and we comforted the family as much as we could.
tell her that he is in a better place and is watching over her and he still loves her and he knows she loves him and misses him. give her a hug, tell her you are there for her and no matter what, her brother will always be with her in her heart
Tell her that you hope he is ok,and that you love her very much.Also be there to support her.
God Bless.
In my experience, dealing with grief is a very personal matter. I’m sure plenty of people have given her advice and it’s enough already. When she begins sobbing over a photo or memory, grab the tissues, hold her hand and be prepared to stick it out. No words are neccessary on your part - just support and listen. When she can begin talking about her brother without sobbing, you will know the healing is progressing. Two years is a normal grieving period.
she feels guilty. there is not often a rhyme or reason for why people die. there was this fantastic christian singer Keith Green who was like a genius and he died in a plane crash with his son and he was not that old. it says in the bible there is a time to live and a time to die.does she need grief therapy?